| Procrastination Destination |
|
||
profileKhai Rul ![]() Create Your Badge | |||
Saturday, October 30, 2010Box me up and send me home.Day 229 "Life could take on any number of shapes while you were busy fighting your own demons. But if you were changing at the same rate as the person beside you, nothing else really matters. You become each other's constant." Internship Just last week we had a one week internship program and were sent to some camp to shadow platoon commanders. To observe them and learn. To see how they lead their subordinates and overcome problems.. So we know what to expect when we are one in the future. It was... pretty insightful. You know how whenever you go to a new place you start to adapt and settle and the first thing ppl usually do is (subconsciously) think of the differences between where they're from and where they currently are. Where I am, life's fucking hectic. But almost everyone's self-motivated to do well. (Retards. ._.) Over there? People book in to take orders, listen to higher command. Really feel like they're serving. Then book out by the end of the week. (Well at least most do.) "What he say I just follow. Just don't get fucked. So I don't feel like shit. The plan is to just get this over and done with. Can already." Ahh.. conscription. It's one thing to force a man to fish and another to force him to learn how to fish. And then, once in awhile you think about the similarities.. About the fact that human beings are fucked up. That they do things for purpose and sometimes it gets expressed so clearly out in the open. You take people from different societies and put them together in a box and you automatically see a hiearchy (however vague) form up, slowly but surely. Taiwan. On another note. I'm flying off again. To freeze and die in the jungle at the top of some random hill surrounded by what i'll think looks the same as the spot I'll be on then before I know it get reincarnated, rejected at the gates and revived back to my body where I'll gasp and wake up with rifle in hand helmet blocking the top half of my vision stomach against the ground flatten dead leaves feel water trickle along feet within wet socks camou half wiped off but still felt insect repellant spammed flags in pocket matador slung on back smoke grenade magazine pouch boots tightened knee guards suffocating joints (blahblahblah..) and say... what. the. fuck. its. morning. day. 1. over. 20. more. days. let's. go. Of course I tend to exaggerate shit that will happen so when the real thing takes place this same shit is expected but when shit doesnt show up or turn out as bad I feel bloody fucking good. Saturday, October 23, 2010.You know sometimes I just wanna retweet your posts. Because you sum it up so well. Great to be out. 1255 Sunday, October 17, 2010One tough act to follow.Day 218 Life's really been crazy the past few weeks. And I'm hangin onnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn. I think. Sigh. Blogging's usually smoother at night, or in the wee hours of the morning. (For me at least.) It's noon right now. I've lost my chain of thoughts. I give up. For now. Tuesday, October 5, 2010False Hope.It's about getting your hopes up high and when things don't happen the way you want them to you've only yourself to blame. Like WTF right.... I hate it when I conjure up these little specific ideas in my head about what I'm gonna do for myself.. or for someone else and the plan always seems so damn perfect until the time to execute the actions arrive then I procrastinate and have doubts and subconsciously feel the feasibility level of the idea gets more impossible. I blind myself with such thoughts of perfection and the benefits I'll reap if all goes well and stop just there. Cuz when you think happy, that's all there is to it. You don't usually think of the sad process towards the happy. Maybe THIS is what we call goal setting, except its mental and not out in the open where other people can see bullet points popping outta your head that they can read and rectify, or even disagree to. Sometimes I feel happy when I think about achieving something. Because you don't really think about the process, you think of its end product. Or even if you do think of the process of attaining this end product and it seems hard and overwhelmingly tiring..... wth? just look at the end product. That's what matters right? And then time passes and not everything goes smoothly. You get dilemmas on whether or not to give up but usually just press on since we're halfway there already. Self defeat's totally not an option. But for how long? Sigh. You don't know anything, do you? No idea at all. |
|||
linksAaron! Amanda! Amir! Ben Goh! Benedict! Charmaine Tay! Cheryl Tan! Cheryl Seng! Debra Jane! ElissaYoung! Gwen! Janice! Jasmine Ee! Jasmine Tee! Jason! Jessica! Justine! Justin Chong! Kesaven! Khaliesah! Leon! Luqman! Mark! Marissa! Ming Hui! Ming Zhen! Naren! Natalie! Nicole! Paolo! Pei Fen! Phillip! Qiyi! Rachel! Rina! Rudy! Sara! Shimun! Tiffanie! Venice! Wanyi! Wei Fen! Wei Hao Ng! Wen Ting! Wendy! Xue Qian! Yeeling! Zhi Pang! creditsOrange Buster© Electric 2009 - Forever. All Rights Reserved.Powered by Blogger. |
|||
tagboardyour Archives | |||